Turn Oh Shit! to Shit Yeah!
The situation isn't important. How you react to it is.
It’s Saturday morning and me, Jason, Tyson Vick, Elizabeth, and a handful of models and other stragglers are at the Loft – an upscale private club—preparing to take some photos for the Built for Show website.
As I’m assuring everyone that we’ll be alone and that no one ever really uses the place, 15 women walk up the stairs to start decorating for a baby shower. Apparently, they had booked it for the day, and didn't seem too enthusiastic we were there.
But instead of a) arguing with them, b) begging and pleading to use the spot, or c) giving in and leaving, I started phase one of “damage control.â€
People are a lot more understanding and willing to help than you may think. All it takes is being firm, nice, and sympathetic to their needs to make a bad situation mutually beneficial.
Here’s what I did (in bold) and what you can do to take your next stressful situation and turn it into a positive. (Note: The below steps all happened in the first ten minutes of them arriving.)
- I asked them what areas of the facility they planned on using. (Luckily, it wasn’t the whole area.) I also found out the duration of their party (from 1-4 PM.)
Listen to their needs first. If you’re the first one to talk, ask them what they need, not what you want.
- I apologized for our intrusion, but then explained the importance of the situation and our time-table. (We’d only be using a specific area of the club for a couple of hours.) I then said “I think we can work around each other, and we’ll be out of here before you know it.â€
Go ahead and apologize if you’re in the wrong. Make it quick and sincere. Be firm and let them know your situation and the specifics (how long you need the area, what time you’re leaving, etc.) Finally, don’t give them an opportunity to say “No.â€
I then offered to help out as much as possible. While the photo crew and the models got ready, I helped carry food, coolers, and decorations from their vehicles, up the stairs, and into the club. I blew up balloons. I filled some ice buckets. And I did it all with a smile.
If you’re willing to ease the burden and help, it’s more likely you’ll be accepted. Do what you can to make it easier for them.
I then offered to have Tyson take a few group photos of the baby shower group (which they loved) and promised to send them the photos via email.
Plant the seed that if they put up with you, they’ll get a reward or some other type of benefit at the end. Again, be sincere and think of ways to help them.
So what was the result of my damage control? A great photo shoot with no hassle or hurt feelings and a chance for them to have their baby-shower memories documented by professional photographer.
Seems like a win-win to me.
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You can also try these steps with waiters, airline attendants, customer service representatives, co-workers, or bosses.
Do you have any “damage-control†tips?
Comments for This Entry
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One word: smooth.
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I am an elementary school teacher. I work at a upscale private school. It isn't rare that a parent comes in, concerned about their son/daughter in some way. I had a veteran teacher key me in to this phrase: "tell me more..."
Often, the parents who come in to a teacher with a concern are met with defensive teachers. This starts off a confrontation, as when one team starts playing defense the other inevitably plays offense.
So, "tell me more" allows the parents to unburden their concerns. It makes me show my concern. Finally, it lets me hear what the parent thinks I can do to correct the situation, which often times is a valuable insight.
Try it yourself... When someone comes to you with a concern, say, "tell me more..." when they are talking to you. They usually just want someone to hear their problems, without offering judgment or without trying to solve them.
COMMENT RULES: Critical posts are fine, but if you're rude I'll delete your stuff. Please do not put your URL in the comment text and please use your personal name or initials and not your business name, as the latter comes off like spam. But most of all, have fun and thanks for adding to the conversation! (Thanks to Tim Ferriss for the inspiration.)
Joe D. 7:02pm Jun 23, 2008